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When Your Abuser Uses Threats of Self-Harm to Manipulate You

Ramelize

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When you’re dealing with an abuser, one common and particularly nasty tactic they use to keep you trapped is threatening to harm or even k*ll themselves if you leave.

It’s a manipulative move, but what’s often missed is that this alone is abusive.

It’s coercion, plain and simple.

Here’s what you need to understand: you are not responsible for staying in a toxic relationship just because they threaten to hurt themselves.

That’s their way of controlling you — using fear to keep you locked in a cycle of abuse. You do not owe them your well-being just because they throw around threats.

And let’s be real — most of the time, these threats are empty. They’re a bluff to keep you in check. But, if you genuinely think they might follow through, there’s a way to handle it.

Step one: you leave. That’s non-negotiable. Step two: call the police and ask for a welfare check. Let them handle it from there.

If the person is in serious danger, they’ll get the help they need, possibly even a trip to the psychiatric ward. That’s not on you.

Abusers are masters at playing the victim. When they’re not being monsters, they put on this “helpless” act, trying to make…

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